"Mindfulness is about paying attention and noticing each moment. Simple, I can do this"... I remember thinking, as I read an article on mindfulness, whilst simultaneously munching on granola, with five tabs open on my browser.

Life is full of distractions. Multitasking has become our modus operandi. 
How often do we give our minds the space to completely transition from one thing to the next?
When we don't give ourselves enough space to process, thoughts and emotions bleed into one another, and our mind becomes stuck on undigested thoughts.


Have you ever sat down with a book, only to realise you're rereading the same sentence for the third time... because you're actually thinking about that annoying thing that person said that morning? If we do not process and mentally "finish" an event, it can linger in our subconscious and continuously come back to distract us.

Psychologist Dr Adam Fraser coined "the Third Space" - a transitional space that helps us to be more present. The concept is this: the First Space is where you are, right now. The Second Space is where you will be next. And the Third Space is the space in between - the transitional space between the First and the Second. 

Most of us wander from the First to the Second space on autopilot, which means that most of our days are spent in a jumbled haze; processing past events and missing out on the present, whilst simultaneously planning the future. We feel like we're constantly chasing our own tails, trying to keep up. This is where the Third Space comes in - to finish our experience in the First Space, and prepare to step into the Second Space. The Third Space consists of three steps : Reflecting, Resting, Resetting. 

When in doubt, drink tea

1. Reflect : think about the positive and negative aspects of the experience - what went well? What was achieved?
2. Rest : give your mind a break. Don't think. Meditate, knit, colour, drink a cup of tea - anything allowing your mind to wind down - to create a distance between activities.
3. Reset : mentally prepare for the next space - how do you want to show up? What do you want to express or achieve?

I use this approach when I have several appointments or meetings in a row. In between meeting with people, I create a space to digest and reflect on things that have been said, felt, and the information exchanged. I sit for a while in this space, before thinking about the next person I will meet, who they are, and how to best relate to them. 

Tip: Try this technique if you're someone who's "not good with names". Repeat the person's name while in the Third Space. I guarantee it will help you remember!